Why can't you see
by SnTAngel
Summary: [AU] CxR. Why can't you see me for who I am, Rosette ... Rosette tries to find an answer and the reason to Chrno's question while both struggle to find out about their changing feelings.


**"Why can't you see …" A Chrno Crusade Fanfiction**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything about Chrno Crusade._

_A/N: Hello there. Though not new to so far I've only been a diligent reader. Now I think it's time that I started a work of my own, or at least a try at it. Please bear in mind that this is more or less a first attempt. Therefore I think that this will be a rather short story, though not a one-shot. Reviews are always welcome of course. Thanx._

** Chapter 1 **

A young girl of about sixteen with azure eyes and blonde hair which hung past her shoulders kneeled by her window, her chin propped on her hands. Listlessly she stared outside. It was near midnight by now and the moon and stars hung brightly in the sky. She could her a few insects buzzing nearby. Altogether it was a splendid summer night. But right now she didn't care about that. Instead, in her mind the same question kept replaying over and over again.

"Why can't you see me for who I am, Rosette ..." her best friend, Chrno, had asked her today. She still wasn't quite sure about what had triggered it.

- -

They had known each other for ages. Even built sand castles together. Chrno had always been her confident, her best friend. When nobody seemed to understand her and everything went wrong, she could always turn to him. She knew he'd understand. He'd stick by no matter what. The girl we've come to know as Rosette had been a real tomboy in childhood, getting into scrapes and playing it rough, therefore always being covered in bruises. The other girls had often shunned her because of her behaviour and because she didn't want to play with dolls. Most of the time little Rosette wouldn't mind this because after all, she'd rather play with Chrno. But sometimes being picked on had hurt – hurt so badly - though she wouldn't show it. Nevertheless, Chrno would always notice and would comfort her.

And he was the only one who had seen her crying when her brother Joshua died, four years ago. Rosette had loved her baby brother dearly, more so as he had always been a bit sickly. After all they had been through a lot. Their parents had died when both were only little and they had been sent to live with foster parents. After a very trying pneumonia Joshua went to sleep one night never to wake up again. After that she was heartbroken, and Chrno had gone to great pains to make her laugh again. He had even bought her an old and tatty pocket watch. 'That will remind you of all the wonderful years you spent with Joshua and a part of him will stay close to you whenever you keep the watch near', he had told her. That – and the fact that hit was her best friend who had given her the watch – made Rosette wear it all the time. She didn't even take it off while sleeping.

- -

And now Rosette fiddled with exactly that pocket watch while pondering over Chrno's question. As alsways she had been confiding in him, asking him about his opinion in matters concerning boys. It wasn't the first time Rosette had done this. Bot now it had gotten a bit more serious. Rosette had a major crush on a fellow student called Billy. She had had it for a few weeks now. And as rumour had it, today she had learned that Billy found her quite cute as well. Now Rosette wanted Chrno's opinion on how to proceed.

"You know, Chrno, he's so handsome. Everyone thinks he's hot. His looks ... and him being in the football team and all." Rosette had a starry look to her eyes as she stared up onto the ceiling of Chrno's room. Both were lying on his bed. It was not unusual for them to spend time together after school, often in either of their rooms. Chrno had recently painted the ceiling sky blue. (Actually he had done so because the colour reminded him of his best friend's eyes, but he was sure not to tell her. Didn't want to risk another noggie.)

"Hmm ...", was all the boy mumbled. He never felt comfortable when Rosette told him about her crushes but he tried not to show it.

"And he has asked me to accompany him to the school dance next week. I'm not sure, should I say yes? You know, he was seen kissing Amy only last week after all." The blonde continued to babble, never once recognizing her friend's rapidly declining mood.

"He might not mean anything serious. I wouldn't wanna be dumped only a couple of days later. Though I have to say, going out with Billy would be like a dream come true. What do you say, Chrno?"

"For heaven's sake, could you just stop it! I've just about had enough of this crap. I'm sick of listening to it over and over again. Why don't you ask Satella about it, I'm sure she could give you some advice. And now I have to help my mother in the kitchen. You know your way out." And with that Chrno jumped up in a way that made the bed shake and stormed out of his room, leaving a very dumbfounded and speechless (!) Rosette behind. What had she said? As Chrno left Rosette heard him utter: "Why can't you see me for who I am, Rosette ...?"

After a few minutes of silent waiting Rosette came to the conclusion that her friend wasn't going to show up again. So she quietly left his house and went home. As she entered the living room her foster mother called out to her from the kitchen.

"You're home, honey? Dinner will be ready in half an hour. I've made spaghetti. And we've got some ice cream for desert."

"Don't want any, thanks. I'm going upstairs." Came the reply in a dull voice.

This alarmed Rosette's foster mother. Rosette not hungry – the world must surely have come to a standstill for this to happen! She stuck her head through the kitchen door, wiping her hands on her bunny-printed apron which had been a present from Rosette and Joshua, and looked after the young girl. All she could see was a drooping head trailing upstairs, her bag trailing behind her and bumping slightly against every step.

"Everything alright, dear? You're not catching a fever, are you?" she asked worriedly.

"No, my head only aches a tiny bit and my eyes are burning. I think I'll go straight to bed. Don't worry. I'll be jake in the morning."

Her mother could clearly detect that things were not fine with Rosette. She concluded that her and Chrno had probably had a fight. But normally those rarely lasted more than a few minutes. She knew better though than to press Rosette. Rosette got moody every once in a while and then it was best to leave her alone (at least if you didn't happend to be named Chrno). So she simply let her be for the moment.

Upstairs the blond pig-tailed teenager threw her backpack into a corner of her room and flung herself on her bed. Thinking of what had just passed during she suddenly felt sobs swelling in her breast. Only seconds later tears formed in her eyes and she cried bitterly – her, Rosette, who had last shed tears at her brother's death. She continued to do so right into the night, not bothering with the tray of food which had been placed in front of her closed door.

After a few hours the heartbreaking sobs gradually died down. Feeling all hot and sweaty Rosette decided to cool off. After changing into her pj's Rosette opened her window and sat next to it, letting a cool breeze caress her cheeks. Gazing to the sky Rosette started to sing softly to herself. "Twinkle twinkle little star ..." She had often sung that particular song for her little brother and right now it helped her to calm down. She could not get Chrno's question out of her head. What had he meant with it? Did she not see him for what he was? How could that be? Coming to no conclusion, all Rosette knew was that it had felt like a stab through her heart when Chrno had uttered it in a quiet voice. Withough really knowing why, she felt really bad.

- -

Meanwhile, only a few houses further along the road, Chrno wondered how he could set everything right again. He knew that he had hurt his best friend deeply. And he had never wanted for this to happen. Hadn't he told Rosette at Joshua's funeral that he would always be there for her. Chrno knew he was the only one Rosette really trusted and showed her true feelings to.

But it had simply been too much. So far he had been contend with being the best friend. Gradually his feelings for Rosette had changed though. He wasn't quite sure when this had started. All he knew was that lately whenever Rosette told him about other boys he'd get really jelous. And now Billy simply seemed to top everthing. Only – how could he ever tell Rosette what he felt for her. Not that he really wanted to. Chrno still hoped that with time his new feelings would pass and he'd remain the loyal and steadfast friend he'd always been. Didn't they always tell you that during teenage years things sometimes started to be a bit confusing and mixed up? And apart from that, how could he EVER compete with Billy.

With a sigh from the bottom of his heart Chrno looked into the mirror which hung behind his door. Even though he knew what he'd see there. He'd done it often enough after all.

"Hello you short, red-eyed freak." Lifting his had to the mirror, his image waved back at him.

It was nothing he could deny. Chrno was short, really short in fact. Even the girls in his class towered above him, not to mention football players like Billy. Secondly, as a result of too little pigment his eyes had a strange reddish sheen to them. People had called them demons' eyes behind his back. And above all, his hair sported a positive purple shimmer, quite unusual and often making him a target for ridicule. Not that he made matters easier when he decided to wear his hair in a braid, a long purple braid. But ever since Rosette had told him she loved his hair way back, he had refused to cut it short. Some of his most treasured memories were of his friend deciding to brush and braid it for him. He simply loved the feeling of Rosettes fingers plaing with his strands.

Chrno sighed with self-pity. No more hair-playing for him it seemed. What had he possibly done to deserve this. And more important, how was he going to fix this mess? He had the notion that a simple apology would not be enough this time. But what to tell Rosette? How to make her see when he didn't understand him himself?

And with this the night wore on. The only witnesses to what the two youths were going through being the moon and the stars.

---

_Tbc_


End file.
